Wednesday, 22 July 2015

Twitchin' T-Rex

Have you ever seen the movie Hoodwinked?  Remember Twitchy, the coffee loving squirrel? Twitchy and the T-Rex have a great deal in common.  We work fast, LOVE coffee and ... How shall I put this?  Get a little twitchy.

Every damn morning

Technically, I'm a little jumpy/twitchy at the best of times, but oooooh do I love that over-achieving rush of sweet caffeine through my veins.  I mean, I recently had a homemade double shot cappuccino that was so good I considered trying to marry it. That mug was clutched to my chest, the warmth seeping into my bitter little heart like true love. (It burns! It burns!)

So ... I like my coffee.

Then there's the Dancing Hippo. She's not a fan of weird unexpected sounds, they make her a little twitchy.

When 1200-1500lbs of hippo gets a little twitchy, its difficult to miss.  Now add in an over-caffeinated T-Rex.

*hippo twitches*
*T-Rex twitches*
*hippo twitches at T-Rex twitches*
*T-Rex twitches at hippo twitches at Trex twitches*

See a pattern? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Its not like I don't 'know' the solution.  Its easy!  DON'T TWITCH.

Primitive Lizard brain + caffeine +gravity = twitchtwitchtwitch

So I think I've come up with the perfect solution for the twitching problem.  A seatbelt and Xanax, or at least a seat belt and tequila.  Definitely leather full seat breeches and tequila in the short term.

Anyone up for a margarita?

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